JUDGE: And what is your profession?
BRODSKY: Poet. Poet and translator.
JUDGE: And who told you that you were a poet? Who assigned you that rank?
BRODSKY: No one. (Non-confrontationally.) Who assigned me to the human race?
JUDGE: And did you study for this?
BRODSKY: For what?
JUDGE: To become a poet? Did you try to attend a school where they train [poets] . . . where they teach . . .
BRODSKY: I don’t think it comes from education.
JUDGE: From what, then?
BRODSKY: I think it’s . . . (at a loss) . . . from God.
You should learn how to say no.You should do kung-fu kicks in memory of dead pets.You should make a basil pesto and fed-ex it to me. You should learn how to blow without even needing a tongue stud.You should sew and knit and chain-smoke and drink too much gin, and grin.You shouldn't be visiting strange girls and their online diaries.You're a voyeur, you shouldn't.You should go watch tv and burn your books, cause being literate doesn't validate understanding, anyway.You get me?
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